"H" Is For Honesty

As always, I want to offer my sincere apology to Sue Grafton for using (stealing??) her approach for the titles of her many outstanding mystery novels for this series of articles that I hope makes YOU a happier and more effective leader working with a truly empowered team that really enjoys what they do! Oh, and if you have not read any of Ms. Grafton novels I highly recommend that you give her a try.

ALWAYS Look Them in the Eye with TOTAL Honesty

“It has always seemed strange to me…the things we admire in men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understanding and feeling, are the concomitants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest, sharpness, greed, acquisitiveness, meanness, egotism and self-interest, are the traits of success. And while men admire the quality of the first they love the produce of the second.”

- John Steinbeck

I’ve talked a lot about building a trusting relationship between you and your Teamers and this all starts with your honesty. Being a Middle is a very difficult life to lead. You are always between your Teamers and the Seniors of your Organization. Difficult decisions will be made by your Seniors and your Organization and you will need to be able to explain them to your Teamers with honesty that you may not get from your Senior.

One essential trait that you must develop is to look your Teamers in the eye each time that you talk with them. Looking down or away or at papers will simply not provide them with the trust that you want them to have in you. In meetings, I always worked to look everyone in the eye, moving my focus from one Teamer to the next. The bottom line is that if you can’t tell them what you have to tell them without looking them dead in the eye, perhaps you don’t really believe what you are telling them.

You must realize that you are the only real link to and translator of all that your Senior and Organization decide to do. This must be translated to your Teamers no matter how difficult this can be for you, with as much total honesty and trust as you can develop. You need to develop the habit of looking your Teamers directly in the eye as you talk with them. Just practice and it will become second nature for you.

You may also experience “extra side benefits” from always looking your Teamers in the eye when you talk with them. One of the side benefits that I experienced was working with Teamer Karen. We were having a One-on-One session and she commented that I was the only manager that she had ever worked for that didn’t look at her chest. Now admittedly, Teamer Karen was a very attractive young lady and well endowed, so I completely understood the behaviors of her other managers, but I took it as a compliment and rededicated myself to always looking Teamers in their eyes when talking with them. 

“If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If I got three more words,

I’d add, All the Time.”

- Randy Pausch

I wish you empowerment, happiness and every success!!

Jonesy